If you search the internet for stories of foreign men falling in love with Thai girls you’re bound to find hundreds of posts articles and stories that have been written over the years. The funny thing is many of the stories you’ll find end badly. The reason for this is pretty apparent.
Typically you’ll see in the story that the writer has been warned about Thai bar girls and yet they continue on thinking “it will never happen to me”. Every month there are stories to be found about Americans, Australians and Europeans either being bankrupted or even committing suicide in Pattaya and Patong over Thai bar girls. We may never know the entire truth about these tragedies, but they carry a similar theme.
What is it that makes men ignore the fact that many relationships with Thai bar girls end so badly? Why do they think that they are different and that their Thai girlfriend will work out as a romance or marriage, even though she’s come from the type of life lived in the bars?
Would these men behave the same way, with the same expectations in their home countries? Would they shack up with a prostitute and expect her to be loving and faithful? I don’t really think so, and it makes me scratch my head to think they have these expectations simply because they are in Thailand.
Maybe they only do this in Thailand because they can’t afford it in their home countries. Or maybe they somehow lose their minds in the craziness that is Thailand. Perhaps it’s their own way of coping with culture shock. Whatever the case, if you’re in a relationship with a Thai girl take a look at this list of questions you should be asking yourself:
1. Does your wife or girlfriend hide her phone calls? Does she get calls at all hours of the night? Doesn’t that make you suspicious? It should.
2. Is your girlfriend or wife always asking for money to send home? Is it the same amount each month? Not definitive, but could indicate a boyfriend or husband back in the home village that she is supporting.
3. If your Thai girl has piercings besides her ears or tattoos it a big warning sign of a bar girl or former bar girl. Good Thai girls don’t do this. This is changing somewhat for the younger generation however so may not be conclusive if your wife or girlfriend is under 25.
4. The biggest indicator of all. Are her friends involved in prostitution? As with any other profession or lifestyle, like types tend to be drawn together because of similar experiences.
The best thing to do is just practice common sense. I know it’s easy to lose your bearings when seeing all the beautiful available girls in Thailand, but try to maintain a sense of normalcy. You may not be used to so much attention from beautiful girls, but get used to it, it’s just like that in Thailand for a foreigner.
Try to think with your higher brain, not the one between your legs. While your new life in Thailand may seem surreal at times try to maintain a sense of reality amongst the insanity. Keep your usual filters about what is right and wrong in place. Too many men seem to deal with the newness of Thailand by setting up a new category in their brain called “This is Thailand”. Anything new or strange gets put through this filter and passes simply because “This is Thailand”” and not the same as your homeland. Some things really are the same dude.
The same evasive behavior from your girlfriend that would set off alarms in your home country should be setting off alarms here in Thailand. Just because all else is different around you doesn’t mean that it’s normal for your new girlfriend to hide things from you or fly off into abusive rages at no provocation.
Listen to your inner voice and if it’s telling you something is wrong then get away. Things may be different in Thailand, but girls are girls everywhere and Thai girls are not that much different from the girls at home. Girls at home lie and cheat and guess what, so do Thai girls. It’s still not the norm, but it is common, especially for the girls that tend to be attracted to foreigners in the first place. Take your time and find a nice Thai girl and you’ll be much happier in the long run.